I just learned AT&T will probably roll out "U-Verse" fiber service in our area soon and went to look at the price and speeds.
Their naming scheme is pretty funny: Pro, Elite, Max, Max Plus, and Max Turbo. It makes me imagine this conversation.
Me: I'm not a heavy bandwidth user. What's your base package?
Them: That would be Pro.
Me: As in Professional?
Them: Yes.
Me: So if I were a professional internet user, I'd want the worst connection.
Them: No, you'd probably want at least Max.
Me: There is more than Max?
Them: Oh yes, there are two more levels past Max. But you probably don't need that. Why don't you try Elite?
Me: How good is that?
Them: It's the second-to-slowest one.
Me: I see. Is your marketing department staffed by native English speakers?
I don't need high speed, but I like where this is going. Maybe I should hold off until they offer Max Xtreme Warp Nuclear.